浅析中西方婚俗之差异.doc

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1、Analysis of Differences between Chinese and Western Marriage Customs浅析中西方婚俗之差异AbstractThere are many procedures in Chinese marriage customs. The book propriety and ceremony, which records earliest wedding ceremony, says that marriage includes six etiquettes, namely, proposing, asking the name, askin

2、g for fortune, sending betrothal presents to the girls family, discussing the date of marriage and meeting the bride. In western marriage, there are four procedures. They are proposal, changing surnames, choosing the day and holding the wedding. Due to different religions, cultural origins, marriage

3、 concepts and geographies, there are many differences existing in the two kinds of marriage customs. In Chinese marriage custom, the matchmaker functions almost all the time and youths have no right to choose and women are not on an equal footing with men. By contrast, in western marriage custom, th

4、e priest functions and the youths have legal right to choose whom they want to marry and men and women are equal. There also exist common things in the two sides. They have been maintained for thousands of years. But in recent years (especially after the founding of new China), people have tended to

5、 discard some of the details and advocate simplified marriage procedures and wedding ceremonies.Key Words：Marriage custom; differences; reasons摘要中国婚俗有着许多的仪式。最早记载婚礼习俗的仪礼云：“婚有六礼，纳彩、问名、 纳吉、纳征、请期、亲迎。”而在西方国家主要有4个程序，即建议，改姓，选期和举行婚礼。由于宗教、文化根源、婚姻观念以及地理环境的不同在一定程度上导致了中西方婚俗的不同。在中国婚俗中，媒人起着决定性的作用，而作为婚姻当事人的青年男女却没有

6、选择的自由和权力，而且男女在婚姻中的不平等现象也屡有出现。 在西方，是牧师在婚姻中起作用，并且青年男女有合法的权力去选择自己的夫婿或妻子。当然中西方的婚俗也存在相同的地方。它们存在了上千年之久。近年来（特别是新中国成立之后），中西结合的婚姻屡有出现。关键词：婚俗；差异；原因Table of ContentsIIntroduction 1II. Chinese Marriage Customs 22.1 Wedding Locations 32.2 Wedding Dresses and the Wedding Colors32.3 The Whole Process of Wedding Et

7、iquette32.3.1 Making Proposing 3 2.3.2 Asking the Name3 2.3 .3 Asking for Fortune 4 2.3.4 Sending Betrothal Presents to the Girls Family 52.3.5 Discussing the Date of Marriage 5 2.3.6 Meeting the Bride 5III.WesternMarriageCustoms.73.1 Wedding Locations 83.2 Wedding Dress and the Wedding Colors 8 3.3

8、 The Whole Process of Wedding Etiquette 8 3.3.1 Making Proposing 8 3.3.2 Changing Surnames 9 3.3.3 Choosing the Day9 3.3.4 Holding the Wedding 10IV. Reasons for the Differences Above 124.1 Religions 124.2 Marriage Concepts 12 4.3Cultural Origins 12 4.4Geographies13V.Conclusion.14References.15Chapter

9、 I IntroductionMarriage is formed in a long historical evolution of the marriage custom in a nation. It is the regularity of the activities that restrains peoples awareness of marriage. Marriage customs binding does not depend on the law, and it cannot rely on science tests either, but on the force

10、of habit, traditional culture and national psychology. During the development of human history, the institution of marriage and family system has experienced different processes of development. Human have experienced group marriage, the dual system of marriage and individual marriage system (monogam

11、y). At a union of a man and a woman and a family formation stage, marriage includes not only marriage, but also the preparation phase for the marriage and the performance stage after the festivities. It runs through the whole process of life. These customs, as a national symbol and cultural developm

12、ent, play a very important role in ethnic studies and the history of mankind. China is a country with an ancient civilization and a long history, and many customs. Among so many customs, there is a particular marriage custom. This custom goes through various and long stages of development from ancie

13、nt simple wedding ceremony to later complex ceremony, from feudal marriage custom to the modern free marriage custom. During these courses, peoples ideas are progressing, though we cannot say that their ideas are up to the top of mankinds ideas in all over the world atall over the time because there

14、 are still backward ideas existing in many places, in many peoples mind and they maybe will still exist for a long time. However, they are up to the top of mankinds ideas in a certain stage of the uninterrupted development of ideas. Greek civilization is the base of western culture. Britain plays an

15、 important role in western history and western culture, and of course marriage custom. Comparing with each other, they are different in many aspects such as in right aspect and in freedom aspect and there are many reasons that result in these differences such as cultural reason and geographical reas

16、on. Chapter Chinese Marriage CustomsLike other folk, marriage custom has the same development and evolving process. In the early days of humanity, the human relationship in a very long period of time still carried the irregular relations like the animal world. There was no marriage at all, if sugges

17、t some, the only arbitrary marriage. In China, marriage has gone through for a long time. As a most grand etiquette, it has always been a high degree of attention. To control the marriage, the family and the whole society, since the beginning of Zhou Dynasty, Chinese marriage should comply with six

18、procedures, which is the so-called six etiquettes. And Later in Tang and Ming Dynasty in China, marriage also complied with the six etiquettes. As time goes by, although many wedding customs experienced various changes six etiquettes as the basic pattern has not changed much. It is still essential a

19、nd core in marriage custom. Marriage has changed much today, but in many places, there still remains traditional marriage custom. In feudal society, a marriage would be decided not by the youths love, but by their parents desires. Only after a matchmakers introduction and when parents considered the

20、 two family conditions were similar and could be matched, would the marriage procedures went forward. Conditions that should be taken into consideration included wealth and social status. If a boys family was well-off or an official family, his parents would never permit him to marry a girl from a p

21、oor family. Essential to the marriage process were the commonly recognized three letters and six etiquettes. The three letters were the betrothal letter, the gift letter with a gifts list and the wedding letter used on the day the bridegroom met his bride at her home. The book propriety and ceremony

22、, which records earliest wedding ceremony, says that marriage usually involves six necessary procedures, namely, proposing, asking the name, asking for fortune, sending betrothal present to girls family, discussing date of marriage and meeting the bride.2.1 Wedding LocationsFor our Chinese, the purp

23、ose of wedding is grand and lively. We invite many relatives and friends. The wedding locations are generally chosen in traffic convenience, a spacious courtyard or hotel.2.2 Wedding Dresses and the Wedding ColorsChinese weddings main color is red, which is a traditional Chinese festival color. The

24、bride usually wears a red dress. There are affixed with red characters, people wear red, new home articles are mostly red.2.3 The Whole Process of Wedding Etiquette 2.3.1 Proposing:Proposing is the first etiquette in marriage and is the first meet between the members in the two families. Thus, it is

25、 very important. Using a common expression, it is making an offer of marriage to another family on behalf of the son or daughter. If the parents thought that the girl could be the daughter-in-law in old times, they would ask a matchmaker for sending the gifts and bring the son and the girl together.

26、 If the girls parents also agreed on the marriage, they would accept the gifts. People usually used a wild goose when sending the gifts. Because the wild gooses could fly to the south or the north according to the seasons, and they would never change it, which implied the woman would be punctual and

27、 also because when the wild gooses flied they were in a row, and when they stopped they were in a line, which implied that woman should comply with the marriage rules and arrange in order that one should not breach it.2.3.2 Asking the Name It aims to ask for girls name and pray. In ancient times the

28、 girls name would not be known by other people until the girl was in an age of marriage. First, one must have the matchmaker and inform of the mans family through a card. And the mans family would lastly receipt for postal remittance. Thus it can be seen that “asking the name” not only meant that th

29、e mans family wanted to know the girls name, but also wrote down the womans birthday and Eight-characters (in four pairs denoting the time, date, month and year of a persons birth, each pair consisting of one Heavenly Stem and one Earthly Branch, used in fortune-telling). If the birthday and Eight-c

30、haracters were not harm the man, the mans family would lastly receipt for postal remittance. Sometimes the womans parents also wrote down the official position of the womans great-grandpa, grandpa and father and the dowry that could be supplied. Whats interesting is that during this progress it was

31、the matchmaker that functioned, not the mans family or the womans family. Matchmaker was also important in the other procedures. In traditional Chinese marriage, people believed “behest of the parents and proposal of a matchmaker”. Thats why many marriages in the past were arranged by parents and ma

32、tchmakers. Matchmakers proposal was the marriages valid basis in Tang dynasty. It has been simplified today. Many marriages do not need this process.2.3 .3 Asking for Fortune After asking the name, the bridegrooms side had got the womans birthday and Eight-Characters and they went to consult a fortu

33、ne-teller then which was called “asking for fortune”. It included two aspects of contents. One was consult the female virtues. Ancient people regarded female virtues as the most important one in the gospel of three obedience that were obedience to ones father before marriage, to ones husband after m

34、arriage, and to ones son after ones husbands death and four virtues that was morality, proper speech, modest manner, and diligent work for a woman according to Confucian ethicsZhong lichun, Zhuge Liangs wife (Zhuge Liang was a statesman and strategist in the period of the Three Kingdoms, now a symbo

35、l of wisdom in Chinese folklore) was famous for her ugliness, wisdom and high female virtues. A man in old times always had many wives. In order to solidify and stead in the family, people paid much attention to female virtues. Hence there was the saying “Marry wife is marrying virtues and take a co

36、ncubine is marrying appearance”. The other one was consult good or bad luck. If they were not fit for each other in Eight-Characters according to the birthday and whats more, the woman would harm the man, the result was that this marriage would not be held and would be cancelled. If the result was f

37、it for each other and moreover the woman would make the man prosperous, the mans side would inform the womans side through the matchmaker and send the betrothal gifts and exchange cards. Thus the marriage was actually decided to be held.2.3.4 Sending Betrothal Presents to the Girls FamilyThe book pr

38、opriety and ceremony wrote by the scholars in Han dynasty regards it as sending money. If there is no receipt of gifts, there is no marriage. Hence whether receipt the gifts or not is the implication of the agreement of the marriage by the womans side. The significance of it includes two aspects of

39、meaning. One is the thanks for the womans parents because the parents feed up her. The other is help the womans family prepare for dowry.2.3.5 Discussing the Date of MarriageIn the past, the bridegrooms side decided the lucky day and sent the matchmaker to inform of the womans family. People paid mu

40、ch attention to the marriage time. They usually had a person looks at the almanac or asked for fortune. They liked having marriage in spring or autumn because spring was the time that everything comes back to life and time when spring was changing into summer and was favor to pregnant with new life;

41、 autumn was the season of harvest. After the labor for a year, people had enough money to hold the marriage. Nowadays, it is also an important event. People pay many attentions to it.2.3.6 Meeting the BrideThe marriage is finally held after the five procedures. In the past, the bridegroom wore weddi

42、ng suit, riding on a horse, and guided the bridal sedan chair to marry the bride on the day. And the bride wears a red cheongsam waiting for the bridegroom. Now, the bridegroom wares western suit, and the bride wears wedding dress and usually in a car.Chapter III Western Marriage CustomsIn the middl

43、e ages children were married at a young age. Girls were as young as 12 when they got married, and boys as young as 14. The arrangement of the marriage was based on monetary worth. The family of the girl who was to be married gave a dowry, or donation, to the boy she was to marry. The dowry went with

44、 her when the marriage was held and stayed with the boy forever after the marriage. After the marriage was arranged, a wedding notice was posted on the door of the church. The notice was put up to ensure that there were no grounds for prohibiting the marriage. The notice stated who was to be married

45、, and if anyone knew any reasons that the two could not marry, they were to come forward with the reason. If the reason was a valid one the wedding would be prohibited. There were many reasons for prohibiting a marriage. One reason was consanguinity, if the two were too closely related. If the boy o

46、r the girl had taken a monastic or religious vow, the marriage was also prohibited. Sometimes widows or widowers took vows of celibacy on the death of their spouse, and later regretted doing so when they could not remarry. Other reasons which also prohibited marriage, but were not grounds for a divo

47、rce, were rape, adultery, and incest. A couple could not be married during a time of fasting, such as lent or advent. Nor could a couple be married by someone who had killed someone. In the middle ages there were few reasons the wedding could be dissolved. One reason was if either the man or woman w

48、ere not of legal age, 12 for girls and 14 for boys. If the husband or wife had previously made a religious or monastic vow or were not Christian, the marriage would be dissolved. The last reason a marriage could end was if the woman, not the man, was incapable of dual relations3.1 Wedding LocationsWestern wedding highlighted solemn and holy, the wedding is generally in the Church or other relatively quiet place, wedding be arranged in good order, but

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